You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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