I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
Randomize