I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Also we had sex while listening to fleetwood Mac on vinyl. Like the 70s called and told me to fuck off
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize