so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
