You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
I just told my bowl "sorry" for putting it down, because I thought I hurt its feelings. omg. I'm high.
Randomize
