I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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