well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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