I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize