Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
