'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
