we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize
