Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Randomize
