are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
