I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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