I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
