I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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