I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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