Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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