Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I FOUND THE LEGS
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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