Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Like when your most normal sex dream is you being a prostitute, you know it's been one long ass dry spell.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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