yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize
