lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
