and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize
