There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
