so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
