i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
