Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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