Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
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Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
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How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
I just forgot I was standing up.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
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