Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize