Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
