wakey wakey hands off snakey
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
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