Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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