You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
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