I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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