I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
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