Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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