I'm lost and stupid without you.
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
