Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Randomize