why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize