I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
