Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize