oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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