Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Randomize
