Me too!
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
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