So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Ugh. I guess I'm crying loudly or something. My mom just came in and gave me milk, chocolate, a Xanax, and her weed "for the break up blues". Her ways of affection are so odd.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
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