When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize