I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Randomize
