you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize
