is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
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