Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I enjoy the company of your penis
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
