It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
